Harper was born on July 8th...this whole week has been hard...not the way I expected to feel..I didn't feel overwhelmed with grief...just sadness that we would don't have her here. I think that being put on bedrest was a blessing in disguise. I got to spend so much time with her...talking to her...letting Landon and Kendall talk to her and feel my belly...Dave and the kids kissing my belly...we would have never had that much time to appreciate the pregnancy if things would have been routine. It was far from fun...it was hard on everyone...but it did give us time...time is everything.
We were not sure how we wanted to "celebrate" Harper...but we finally decided that we would go to dinner and visit the cemetary. We walked around her grave and the kids told her how much they loved her and that she was their little sister...they yelled Happy Birthday out of the car window as we were leaving...they are so sweet. Kendall was especially worried about Harper being buried and having dirt on her face...it's interesting to see how kids think and interpret death.
We have tried to shield them as much as possible...I don't want them to worry and think that this a normal occurence...for babies to die. However, we have had to be honest and let them know what happened to their little sister. The doctors and priest we have talked to recommended that we tell them exactly what happended so that they would have closure....Harper was a part of our lives and always will be...we may not see her now but one day we will be reunited...until then we celebrate our sweet little girl here on earth...while she celebrates with all the angel babies in heaven.
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